Life's an Adventure.

Kids and Trees

2008-04-06T16:47:00.000-07:00

Our day at the Liberty Park in Salt Lake City reminded me of our time in Petro's "Central" Park so I thought I'd write a quick note. The weather was somewhat overcast, the temperate a tad nippy, and the kids running from attraction to attraction. We played together on the swings, explored the duck pond and even sampled the very small amusement park rides. Coming together as a family, I find, has to have many such activities.

Five months have come since all seven of us have been together on American soil. Our home is no different than any other with ups and downs, smiles and frowns, etc. But certainly progress cannot be denied. The girls have thrived in school. Julia's last report card put her on on grade level in almost every subject. There has been basketball, tumbling, learning to swim, learning to rides bikes and rollerblades, and Little Miss Olivia's true love, ballet!

Thankfully the language has come very quickly. Julia gave a 5 minute verbal report to her 4th grade class, complete with a power point program. She did a wonderful job. Olivia loves to sing along with the radio to all her favorite songs and both can express themselves on demand. Gratefully, they have been willing to continue cultivating their native language. Both have taught me to pray in Russian and love to help me with new ways to say thanks. Gratitude is a powerful thing. As I look back on the events of 2007 they seem as a dream, a very powerful dream. Sacrifice, along with untold effort have brought the sweetest blessing of all, to love and be loved.

guy

30 Days Hath September...

2007-12-06T09:02:00.001-08:00

The 30 days of November have come and gone since the girls walked into our lives forever. Of course, their new citizenship of this great land affords them many and overwhelming opportunities. Time has been spent getting to know each other more, learning the language, and helping them understand what is like to have parents. All in all, things have gone quite smoothly.

They were enrolled in school 5 days after they arrived. To which they have received a hero's welcome and made many friends. Julia has been playing basketball in the local girls league and once she realized it was against the rules to touch anyone she has done very well. She also has learned to ride a bike and loves to ride around the neighborhood. Swimming is our next adventure as neither Julia nor Olivia can. Piano lessons will follow but that hasn't stopped them from teaching themselves in the meantime.

The girls have really enjoyed the chance to go out to a restaurant now and then. Julia showed her gratitude by licking the spoon of the fruit topping bowl at the local Chuck-O-Rama and kindly leaving for someone else to use. On a sad not however, the did not enjoy having their hair cut as each had their own plans that were not realized. They are very excited for Christmas but it took awhile to help them understand it wasn't the day after Thanksgiving. But the major highlight has been the public access to fruit. They are convinced it is really all they need. On the flip side, it has been refreshing to see some get excited at the prospect of fruit for dessert.

We've been reading about attachment and trying to look for signs of concern. They seem to be doing very well attaching to us physically and emotionally. Our biggest challenge has been having them let go of the fact that they don't fulfill the parental role themselves. That is okay for them to let their guard down and have an adult oversee their lives for a time. This real life "power struggle" has brought some tears and frustrations. But over time and with a measure of consistency, I have also seen a sense of freedom and relief pour over them. Kids are really good and being kids and when they realized it was safe to be a kid again it has come very naturally to them. Not to mention very rewarding as a parent to witness. They are beautiful, talented, sensitive children and I feel blessed to have them in our midst.

guy

In Conclusion.

2007-11-24T20:46:00.001-08:00

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost

Return Travel to Almaty was quite different than our first jaunt to Kazakhstan. First of all I was alone. Secondly, I was on a mission to rendezvous and recover our two daughters from middle Eurasia. "I move faster alone" I told myself, like some kind of green beret on top secret mission in the jungles of Vietnam. So fast in fact, that the first thing I did upon landing in enemy territory was move so hasitly through the airport in the early morning hours, I found myself outside the main exit surrounded by 10 hungry taxi drivers hovering over me like buzzards. No problem, I'll just pivot around and come right back where I came from. Yeah, except for the very obvious universal sign that screamed DO NOT ENTER! So I did what every non Kazak speaking man should when being stalked by cabbie's. I took a quick look around... and went for it anyway! I really thought I had it made when all of sudden from out of no where a very serious security guard welding "heat" stopped me moments before I disappeared into the crowd. My story fell on deaf ears as he kicked me all the way to the curb. "Welcome to Kazakstan" one of the cabbies blurted in crude English. I had been given orders that I would be picked up, briefed and shuttled to my hotel by someone I had never met, holding a clearly marked sign with my name. But whomever that joker was, he wasn't anywhere near where I thought he should be when I needed him to be there. I made a few attempts to use my new phone, which I had been assured would work abroad, as the vultures came in for the kill. "Vsoy harrasho!" (my translation for I'm okay!) I said over and over. Unfortunately, they woulld not be worthy to be called taxi drivers if they gave up that easy. And after what seemed like an hour I decided I had to get back inside again to find my ride. And save my life. Scanning the surroundings I found the entrance just to my left. Of course I had to check back through security, complete with interrogation. Once through headed for the mass of people awaiting the arrival of their loved ones. At that moment things started looking up and just like it was planned I found my savior, Nickoli. Funny thing was, I didn't feel any safer. I said a silent prayer and introduced myself.

Nickoli, the nicest guy in the world.

MORE TO COME.

guy

Home At Last.

2007-11-02T11:41:00.001-07:00

We arrived home in Utah on October 31st. It was a 30 hour journey that made us tired but not tired enough to keep them us treat-or-treating in our new neighborhood. We dressed as princesses and looked very beautiful. Our parents told us that in United States we can go treat-or-treating every night.

Ha! Ha!

Greetings to Uintah Elementary 2nd and 4th grade classes. We are excited to meet you.

Julia and Olivia.

ps Our parents will be posting pictures as soon as they get their camera working again. My dad will also sum up his experience in Almaty and learning to communicate with us for 2 days without much help from a translator.

Change of Plans

2007-10-26T07:33:00.001-07:00

It's getting colder.

Over the past week we have been finalizing the details of my trip to Almaty. Yesterday we made a change to our plane tickets that will allow the girls and I to return home on Wednesday Oct 31 rather than November 3rd. The schedule in Almaty will begin early Monday morning and be a busy two days.

I leave Saturday afternoon at 1:30 and land in Almaty very late Sunday night. The girls will already have been escorted from Petro by Sholpan and will be with our new translator, Oleg and his wife. Whether I will see them that night is unsure. Hopefully they will be asleep preparing for an early rise Monday morning. They are counting the days.

Meanwhile back at the ranch, Debbie will be making final preparations for the arrival of the girls. Everything that could be anticipated has been taken care of. Certainly there will be some "Oh yeah, I can't believe I didn't think of that" moments. On Friday we will celebrate our last day as a family as we know it.

All of the girls in our neighborhood are excited to throw a party for the Olia and Yulia. Our home is always full of neighborhood boys and now it seems that with the arrival of two girls, the total net gain will be more like five or six.

Here's to a new life!

guy

Father Time

2007-10-16T10:59:00.000-07:00

My new favorite cycling team.

Kazak flag proudly on display.

Not many of these stickers around.

Time is a strange thing. Moving quickly for three weeks while in Petro, and coming to a screeching halt the past two. We are still hoping that the return trip to KAZ will happen this coming Saturday but a national holiday has got everyone worried that paperwork won't be ready. As it stands, we have an airplane ticket on hold for travel Oct 27-Nov 3rd. We also decided for many reasons that I (Guy) would be going alone to retrieve the girls. I will fly to Altmaty and have our coordinator, Sholpan, escort the girls from Petro.

Showing the pictures we sent.

We have been corresponding through our translator, Igor. His wife Nadiya has been teaching English lessons to the girls. Every couple of days we get an email with a few pictures, with us replying with some photos of our own. An Amercian couple from Tennessee, Bill and Cathe, have been so kind as to send some photos and pass along our love when the see the girls at the RBS. Everything is going well in the meantime but the girls can't wait to be with us. The feeling is mutual. Since our waiting period is over the girls belong to us and if we were in country they could stay with the family while the immigration paperwork shuffle continued. Unfortunately due to timing, that is not a reality for our family. Thankfully the memories of our time in Petro has been deeply embedded in hearts and mind.

Yulia and Taunya (who 14th day of bonding with her parents just finished)

Debbie has been nesting. Building a wardrobe for the girls has been a serious task. She usually buy all the boys clothes for the follwoing year at clearance sales. Clean. Quick. Easy. Debbie has perfected the artform. By the time she is done the store sometimes owe her money. This time we have had to watch ourselves with all the cute girl clothes so readily avaiable. Truthfully, it has been fun to see the things see has brought home to proudly hang in their closet. Of course, shoes and coats are my weakness. I have placed an order for warm "puffy" coats in blue and pink and helped Deb choose some very cute, functional (of course) shoes.

A father knows best.

Practicing English.

Safe Travels.

2007-09-29T21:24:00.001-07:00

Funky building.

View to the north.

Government building.

View to the South, Presidental Palace in the distance.

Under construction.

Tallest building in town.

The Mosque.

Government building.

View to the east.

Friday morning we flew from Petro to the new capital of Kazakhstan, Astana. Because the capital has been recently relocated the President of the country has allocated serious money to get things up to snuff. It looks more like Las Vegas than Kazakhstan. It was real shocker to see all the new buildings, lights, and hustle and bustle. We hired a driver for a couple of hours to show us around and get some photos. The Baiterek, the tower in the center of town, and made a wish at the highest point, it's a local custom. Aftewards we spent the evening with a couple from California doing Humanitarian work. Great company and mexican food, can't beat that.

The Baiterek.

Making a wish.

Saturday morning came early as the wake up call rang promptly at 4 am. We had a flight that left at 7 am for Vienna and considering our last close call in Astana, we weren't taking any chances with missing this time. By 1:30 pm Kazak time, Vienna was a reality and after a couple hour layover we were Chicago bound. Now I'm not really a fan on sitting on a plane for 10 hours but Austrian Air was the best carrier I've ever flown. Food was great and I caught up on some movies. And all in all, it wasn't too bad. The last 30 minutes were tough on the kids as the lack of sleep started to take its toll. Janse fell victim and crashed 10 minutes before we landed and Denver tried as we taxied in. I refused to have 2 dead Indians so I prodded him, forcing him to tell me jokes and stories until we unloaded.

Once in Chicago food was in order. The mind willing but the flesh was weak and besides myself it mostly went to waste. Our three hour layover turned into four as our plane had some issues. When we finally boarded everyone was together in the front row, except me. I was all the way in the back. Which, turned out nice as we moved a few people around and I got some breathing room. Debbie wasn't as fortunate. She had been seated in front of the "loud talker", and despite me and the boys getting some shut eye, she had a very long, noisy, bumpy, 3 1/2 hour flight.

Shortly before landing I sat up and looked out the window. We were high above the cloud layer. It was dark and for the first time in a month I realized I hadn't seen the stars. Suddenly, the plane banked hard left over Brigham City and right in front of my eyes was the Big Dipper in all it's glory. I couldn't help but make a wish, a wish for ALL the children we had loved, and left, that the watchful eye of the God of Heaven might be upon them.

There is a time a place for everything. Indeed, it was hard to leave, but it feels good to be home. Thanks to all for your support and love.

guy

Final day at the Boarding School.

2007-09-29T21:06:00.000-07:00

Last photo with the Assitant Director.

So long...Farewell....Alwiederzien...Goodbye.

We scurried around all day on Thursday like a bunch of busy mice. It was our last full day in Petropavlovsk and there were many last minute errands, gifts, and souvenirs. We did some MORE paperwork in the morning and then went back to the market again before going out to the boarding school for our last visit. The day before we took the girls to the market and let them pick out some white embroidered sheer cloth. I only told them that they needed to pick something that they liked and I would keep it for a long time. On the walk back to the hotel, I asked Nadia to explain to Yulia that I would save it for when they decided to get married. My idea is to make all or part of their wedding veil out of it. Hopefully, they will want a veil and if not then maybe we can find a way to incorporate at least a small piece into the dress. Since marriage can be an occasion of uniting families, it struck me that it would be a very special thing to also have some sort of remembrance and token of where they came from and who they are. We don’t know if they will want to remember any of it right now, but at some point it will enrich their lives to cherish the good things and heal and learn from the not so good. I sincerely hope that by the time they do take the marriage step, that they will have done this and take with them the strength of their ancestors and current family with them into their new life.

So as soon as we got back from the market on Thursday, Igor and the RBS Director, picked our whole family up in the school van to go purchase the gift we were giving to the school. It is customary to give gifts to the orphanage you are adopting from as well as the Regional coordinator, translator, caregivers, and social workers. The orphanage gift is by far the biggest and we asked the director what he wanted that was around $300. He said that his office staff could really use a scanner/printer/copy machine. It was very cool to see that as soon as we arrived at the school, that the secretaries had already cleared a place and had it going lickety split. They saw us in the hall and came out saying “spaciba, spaciba!” They were just so happy! We also stopped by the temporary shelter on the way out to the boarding school to take some pictures of the place where the girls were for a couple of months before being transferred out to the orphanages. I am sure glad that Guy had this on his agenda because I just don’t think I would have thought about going there or out to Poulindino where Olia had been before coming to the RBS. But the girls are so happy that we did and I am sure will always be glad to have a record and visual reminders of those places. It really is amazing the kind of system they have here to care for the children. So many loving caregivers, warm beds, good food and education. There are a couple of really remote orphanages that have it tough, but for the most part, the ones located in populated areas are really havens compared to the circumstance the children where in before entering the system.

Saying Goodbye.

Once we finally made it to the RBS, we had a little bit of time with the social worker and the girls to get some more pictures for the court files. Apparently they didn’t like the fact that the other pictures had dates imprinted on them, so I had to turn that function of and go again. Then Guy and I were whisked off to have a customary lunch with the director, assistant director and one of the social workers, Tatiana. Man what a lunch! You just can’t go wrong with freshly prepared food cooked up by their very own Chef Helga. And there was plenty of it to go around. There were also some toasts given and some chattering, through Igor our interpreter. Usually they toast with a shot of some alcoholic something or other, but we stuck to the juice. They all laughed over it of course, but it was all in good fun. It was good to be part of the event and experience the generosity of the staff.

So Sad.

The saddest part was that as soon as we were done, we had to get the boys and go. It was already 5:30 pm and the van had to get us back to the hotel. This was the moment I hadn't been looking forward to all day. The boys got some final play time with the girls but Guy and I didn’t even get more than 15 minutes with them. But, we had to go and say goodbye. Of course, Guy was held together with the idea that we will come back and bring them home for good. This did not work for me, I was still a wreck anyway. Little Olia and I shed our tears and even Yulia, trying to be tough, could not keep them all back. The sweetest part was to experience them tenderly wiping the tears off my face and giving me hugs of comfort. We didn’t drag it on too long. We left them our love and went on to the hotel.

Last supper.

That night we had a fun evening at a German restaurant with Igor, Nadia and our other adopting American friends, Paul and Erin. It was good fun only to be followed up with a bunch of packing before going to bed that night at the hotel. It is time to fly home!

deb

Court Score: Women 3 Men 0

2007-09-27T05:36:00.000-07:00

Boys with Kazak tie tacks to impress the judge.

From the very moment we set foot into the courthouse all eyes were on us. This is something we’ve grown accustomed to as we’ve spent the last three weeks as the center of attention everywhere we’ve gone. So much so, that the boys think it’s more like “show time” and they use it as a chance to perform their antics and exercise their outside voices. It’s become kind of a game to them. But today was different, very different.

Court is no place for children, and their games, but the boys insisted that they come along even if that meant sitting outside in the hallway. So there we were, all dressed up, sitting in the foyer while everyone else looked on. All at once, our regional coordinator burst through the doors, chatted with the guards on duty and motioned for us to follow. As we climbed stairs I could hear someone calling “muchina”, “Muchina”, “MUCHINA!” to be interpreted as Sir. I knew exactly what he was saying and exactly who he was speaking to; but feeling safe with Sholpan, (“touring the facility and taking up slack,”) I continued on, paying him no mind. Not to be ignored any longer the male guard made his presence known. In a quick exchange of Russian betwixt he and Sholpan, he was dispensed without further argument. I’ve watched Sholpan work over the past few weeks and this lady gets things done. She been very nice, helpful but deep down she’s all business, wielding her “machete to cut through red tape.” With the first hurdle of the day behind us, I had high hopes that the rest of the day would be dealt with as swiftly. Chalk that up as victory #1 for the women.

They call it court and surely it is. Complete with Judge and a Prosecutor, but it’s not as grandiose as we Americans are used to. It would be just as accurate to call it “ very large office." The Judge was a woman in her fifties, I guessed, draped in a long purplish robe. She had short black hair, with the “Cruella De Ville” blond patch on the left side of her head. She was very confident and in charge, but welcoming, although refusing entrance of the children. We entered her lair, the official Seal of Kazakhstan mounted proudly high on the wall behind her, and she proceeded to explain our rights. Through the interpreter I again expressed our desire to adopt the lovely children we had spent the past three weeks getting to know. I explained that the adoption was not new to us, as we had already adopted our middle son, and that we prepared to provide an atmosphere of opportunity for all of our children and so forth.

It is a common belief that court is a formality. If this is the case then someone forgot to give our Judge the memo. I was glad I felt strongly about our chances, as she got right down to business and had me wondering for a time. She was there, afterall, to represent the Republic of Kazakhstan, the children, and to her credit she had done her due diligence. Quickly she spotted an error in the paperwork and after chastising Sholpan, got right to work quizzing me on why I thought having more children was the way to happiness. “Do they pay money for kids in America?” she asked. “What makes you think you know how to raise girls?” “What happens when the girl’s background rears its ugly head?” “What about the parents who adopt children and kill them, 14 cases on record to date?” One after another the questions came and looking back I don’t think I did a very good job of answering. Finally, she’d had enough fun and told me to be seated. Make that victory #2 for women.

By order of the court Debbie rose to her feet, stated her name and purpose as the questions began. “Is your marriage stable?” “ Are you sure you have enough money to provide for the girls? “What about time? Girls take time and they need their mother, you know.” “Don’t you think three children are enough children?” It was non stop, like rapid fire from a machine gun. I was really proud of Debbie, she defended herself and mothers everywhere very well. By the time she as done, everyone in the roomed was touched, and people were wiping the tears from their eyes. Victory #3 for women. Benefactor, mankind.

The movers and shakers.

After our interrogation, the two social workers involved, both women, were both asked to state their opinion. Many kind words were said on our behalf, everyone amazed at how well bonding period has gone for both families from what they had seen and been told by the girls. At some point during the proceeding I’d glanced out the window across the road at the adjacent building and realized I was staring at the Dept of Education building. This would be the very same building where we’d stood 3 weeks ago explain to another woman of authority that we indeed had room in our hearts for two girls. For most of the trip I’ve been very in control of my emotions but right there in that courtroom I was on the verge of a serious meltdown. As I looked around, I realized that the room was full of seven successful women, myself and the translator excluded. I felt lucky to be there, beside my wife, sharing our personal feelings about the importance of family while they listened on.

All in the family.

After a short recess the entire family, boys included, were invited back into her office where the judge read her decision. Affirmative. She wished us luck and asked if we had any further questions. Now you know me, always one for a risk. “Just one,” I said, “Would you mind if we take a family photo with your highness?” She had a sense of humor after all.

guy

Best of the Boys

2007-09-26T10:10:00.000-07:00

Yulia's monkey meets the boys stuffed animals.

Just in case there was any doubt in anyone's mind, these guys are the unsung heroes of the entire proceedings. With us through thick and thin, they have remained a source of joy, and occassional pain, for the past few weeks. A true reminder that the grass is not always greener, just quieter in someone else's family. To the locals, we are walking three ring circus. But truly, we needn't look far to find that we have been blessed with great kids, great brothers, to both me and their sisters. I feel honored to be called their father. I've never been much to brag about my children but for the record this unique experience we've shared together has been something I think everyone will remember. And with any luck, never forget. guy

Kazak coneheads.

And in the center ring, the wonderboy, Jansen.

Posing "Don Juan" style for the locals.

Two peas in a leather pod.

Hide and Seek.

Best of Olia

2007-09-24T22:44:00.000-07:00

First photo.

Friend.

Focused.

Pouty.

Snuggly.

Hungry.

Little sister.

Little girl.

Doll.

The Best of Yulia

2007-09-23T21:12:00.002-07:00

First photo.

I'm running out of things to say so I'll let the pictures do the talking instead. These are my favorite photos of our "Princessa" Yulia. guy

Big sister.

Ice cream.

Dirty hands and face.

Bubbles.

Yulia and her Lemur.

New Outfit.

Old Churches and a widow's mite--Sunday Sept 23rd

2007-09-23T07:22:00.000-07:00

Guy and the Girls overlooking the river

We got lucky with another family outing today. This time we took in the sights around Petropavlovsk. The town is small enough that it only took about an hour to see everything that our translator could think of. We drove to the Birch Forest and yes, there are a lot of Birch. I could tell that the driver of the van was wondering what the big deal was about seeing the birch forest, but hey it must be somewhat important since we bought a couple of things carved out of birch from a local store. It was pretty, too. Then we drove to the river which is on the north part of town. We stood at the top of a small (200 feet) bluff and looked down on it. That is the only hill that we have seen since being here. Even Astana was very flat. Then we drove past the University. That was pretty cool and Igor said that it is one of the top 3 Universities in Kazakhstan. I don’t know how many of the graduates stay local or what they all go in to, but I was glad to see the post high school opportunity for the locals.

The birch forest and some local wildlife

Since the country is half Muslim and half Russian Orthodox, there are some great churches. We saw a 200 year old Russian Orthodox church currently under renovation, a new one (down the road from the Regional Boarding School) and a mosque that is not far from our hotel. When we have gone out and about, we have actually heard a couple of Muslim prayer chants permeating local neighborhood by way of a loudspeaker (at least I assume that is what it is.) I really like listening and when I hear it, it turns my thoughts heaven ward as it should.

Ye Olde Russian Orthodox church--renovatoions in the background

While we were driving down to the river, Yulia and Olia recognized a building they called a Sanatorium and said that they had been there with their mother. After chatting, Guy and I realized that it was not the same we were thinking of that would be in the U.S. Apparently, a Sanatorium, is a cheap version of a spa. The girls said that they remembered going there and playing in the gym that was there and having a lot of fun while there mom was doing something else in the building. Then Guy asked them if they remembered where they had lived. They did. They gave a name to the place they lived and Igor said that it was a scary part of town where cab drivers charge double to take you there at night (really) and won’t take you at all if you look suspicious. Igor called it the working class area and it is obviously on the “wrong side” of the tracks. The first thing that popped in my mind was, how did Yulia and Olia survive time alone in that kind of situation? It makes me so sad. I wonder how they felt living there. I wonder what they saw. In time, I hope we come to know and I hope the girls can make peace with anything or anyone that was not good to them. Guy and I don’t have any idea if anything awful ever happened or not, as if neglect and a father in prison aren’t bad enough. But, we do know that they are good girls and I really feel that Yulia is especially wise, discerning and drawn to what is good. Olia is still young behaviorally. Her age is 8, but her emotional state is a year, or probably two, behind. Yulia has had to be her mother, so she has gotten a lot of things her way with a little bit of pouting and whining. Even though she does well at the RBS with all the structure, it is obvious that she will have to learn to take accountability for her actions and do things she may not want to do in order to improve her chances at life in general. We aren’t too worried, but it will take some effort, thought and lots of love to help her. And with parenting being what it is, we hope both Yulia and Olia choose to be helped.

After our sightseeing trip, we spent some time playing with the kids at the school. Cade, Jansen, and Denver spent time playing with some of the boys on the jungle gyms. It was so fun to watch how boys play just like normal even when there is a language barrier. King of the Mountain, running, jumping and doing tricks is a world wide form of play. Meanwhile, Guy played goalie for some older kids on the dirt soccer field. At 37, Guy is still a boy, but I guess that is a good thing to have Peter Pan as your husband. I filmed a little of that and the girls just played around with their friends. They just love to have me watch them swing on the bars and play with stuffed animals. If I teach them the phrase “watch me Momma” then that is probably all I will ever hear. The only thing better to them is when I video their tricks and antics. One of the things that really touches me is Yulia’s thoughtfulness. She brings me a little something most days and the first thing she does is give it to me. It might be a little bouncy ball, broken bracelet, used lipstick, mood ring or other little trinket, but she really wants me to have whatever it is. She is just so sweet and I am so moved by her gift of the “widow’s mite.” She really gives me all that she has. A quality that I cherish and I hope will stick with her even as her life instantly changes when she lands in America.

The most popular soccer surface in the world, dirt.

Deb

Waiting for court

2007-09-21T05:01:00.000-07:00

Cade's quads have been getting a lot stronger lately.

Our 14 day bonding period ended Wednesday the 19th of September. Our appointment for court has been set for next Wednesday the 26th at 10 AM. This will be the perfect situation as we will need to do some finishing paperwork on Thursday, give gifts, say good bye and then fly out to Astana on Friday. Our flight home will leave Astana at 7AM on Saturday and arrive in Salt Lake that evening at 7:30pm. So that will be a 24:30 hour trip from Astana to Salt Lake when you take into account the 12 time zone changes. Unfortunately we will have to leave the girls for the mandatory 15 day waiting period which is followed by a weeks worth of birth certificate and visa processing. That will take about 3 weeks total and then I can come back and bring them home!

Waiting a week for court is a little difficult, but well worth the wait. I am sure it will be harder to come home without Yulia and Olia. The process already takes a while and then the added return trip adds to the suspense. Some people stay the whole time, but we are not able to do that. We have been lucky to be able to come and bring the boys with us even on this first trip. At least the second trip only requires one parent and only takes 3-4 days. So that will be nice. All I have to do is come and take the girls through their medical appointment near the embassy and then when the results from the blood tests come back the next day, then we go through the embassy to pick up visas and so forth and then go home. If we get extra lucky, Guy will be able to come. I am OK going alone, but he doesn’t want me to do that. I just get worried about things that need to be taken care of at home, the boys, extra airfare and blah blah blah.

Someday this crazy clan will be together in Utah.

This process also has to be done in the city of Almaty in the south part of the country. So it will be a fun experience to see that part of the country. The south region is much more “Kazakh” than Petropavlovsk. With Petropavlovsk being so close to Russia, it is very much Russian influenced in culture. Almaty, on the other hand, is 4 hours by plane to the south and therefore much different. This is the region that the Silk Road, a very popular and ancient trade route, passed through. There are a lot Arabic and Muslim influences in this “silk road” part of the country. So it should be a fun little visit come about the 3rd week in October with the best part being that we get to bring home the girls and call this journey finished!

The Kazakhstan Flag

Yulia and Olia are doing great. I am getting a little overwhelmed with us leaving next week. I have to make sure we get some things for them before we leave. Yulia’s birthday is October 12th and so we will leave a birthday box with Nadia, our translator’s wife. We also have to get them dresses for court and one more outfit for their trip to Almaty to meet up with me. Then there are the gifts for people here in Petro and the Regional boarding school that we need to finish up. It is hard to express to people how you feel with a little gift. And then because of the language barrier, you can’t write a nice note or come up with a catchy little phrase (attached to Utah honey) like “thanks for being one honey of a caregiver!” Or how about this (attached to a salt shaker filled with Great Salt Lake salt,) “we will always savor your friendship!” OK, OK, I wouldn’t think of it! But, you get the drift. I will, however, have Igor or Nadia help me write out a couple of the more important notes I want to leave. The most important things I hope a few of the people involved understand is just how grateful were are for their pure intent, hard work on behalf of children and the pure love of Christ they posses. This would not even be remotely possible without these amazing people. God has to have people to work through to take care of all his children, young and old! And we are grateful to be among those that have been helped in many ways at the present moment.

Deb

You Good People--Official Bonding Ends.

2007-09-19T23:18:00.000-07:00

The Perry Calender.

The days are beginning to run together and according to my daily vitamin regime it’s 2 down and 1 to go, weeks that is. I mean seriously, using planetary alignment for determining the actual date is so old fashioned! The last two bonding days have been wonderful. One spent here at the hotel (day 13) and yesterday (day 14) back at the Regional boarding school. All in all, we’ve spent a lot of time playing together as a family and walking from place to place, intermixed with snacks on yogurt and ice cream, banana’s and bubble gum. Every Yin deserves a Yang.

Bubbles on the roof.

Yogurt is yummy and that jacket and those pig tails are too cute.

We borrowed an electronic translator for our excursion and slowly have begun to learn how to work the dang thang. Cade and Yulia have been having conversations betwixt themselves which has been very enjoyable to watch. Cade’s initial communication explained what the translator could actually do and how it worked. I watched as she read the Russian version of Cade’s text and when she finished you could she her eyes widen and the light go on. She typed frantically in Russian a very long sentence then pressed the translation button. That moment in time seemed to linger for sometime until Cade finally announced the decoded message. “You good people.” Cade seemed to be a little puzzled by the fact that all those Russian words somehow where magically reduced into a phrase in our language consisting of only three words. But what power those three words had on me. At that moment, my heart was deeply touched, and as her soon-to-be father, I appreciated her vote of confidence. I wanted to be good people. It is a desire of my heart, but as she will come to realize, I’m still a work in progress. Love can indeed be blind. But not to lose the moment, I grabbed the translator and typed “You are a beautiful princess,” to which she looked at me, smiled and blushed. Priceless.

Conversation via the translator.

Our visit yesterday at the RBS was unlike any another. The girls were not expecting us and because we showed up early, were not perched in the waiting position by the gate. That left us to find them. We ventured upstairs to Olia’s family and within a few short moments she was found. She was so excited. I left Debbie to gather Olia and I had Nina, a beautiful 13 year old girl who will be going home to a new family in Alabama next week, lead to me to her friend, Yulia. We caught her completely off guard and she ran towards me, jumped into my arms and gave me the biggest hug yet. Quickly she gathered her stuff, we rejoined Deb and Olia, and headed for the Foyer.

Nina, Yulia's friend. My tour guide.

Our translator met us there with the Head Lady in charge of all the children. She escorted us down a long, dark corridor to a very small room with a couch and table. We posed for a few pictures with the lady from the orphanage (this is required to show the court) while the girls cut out the paper dolls. She asked the girls’ questions about the past two weeks and about going to America, having brothers etc. It was so interesting that I forgot I should have been video taping it for posterity. Eventually, she signed off our newly updated log book and excused herself. For the next 2 hours we sat there as the girls (and Deb) cut, cut and cut more outfits for their dolls. We were lucky enough to have Nina in our company, we chatted about her family. She showed us the pictures from the visits with her new parents and summer camp, a lot of which contained pictures of our girls. I drew a map of the United States showing Utah and Alabama, how close they were, and that she could easily have her parents drive her up for an afternoon visit. She laughed. It was nice to laugh because the process of time our conversations turned more serious as we asked the girls if they had more questions about America.

Visit with RBS personnel.

“Do they really have bears? Do the bears eat people?”

I shared the story about my father who, very recently, had almost hit bear with his big truck. But he lived was far, far away and no bears liked our neighborhood. I failed to tell them about the cougar spotted just before we left in a neighbor’s backyard. But, I did tell them about the cougar food, the cute little deer that make a mess of our attempts at landscaping.

“Do the deer eat people?” Olia asked.

“No, just the expensive trees and shrubs we plant in the yard,” I joked.

Speaking of joking, Yulia quiered. “Do they really cut kids up, can them, and sell them on the shelves?”

Just that morning we had chatted with some other Americans about some of the things the kids are told about what is REALLY going to happen to them when they get to the states. At the top of the list is selling their body parts for money. For reasons I have yet to fully understand, there are some serious misconceptions floating around the minds of these children.

For the first time I realized the “risk” the girls are taking by coming home with us. Due to their age, they are not allowed to make the decision for themselves. Certainly we have asked them to share their feelings, as nobody wants to bring anyone home that doesn't want to be there, but legally they don’t have any rights. They rely on the adults, including us, and everyone at the RBS to decide if this is a good situation for them. “You good people,” flashed through my mind. Only this time it meant , ALL THE GOOD PEOPLE who have been involved in this process with us. More than ever before, I'm was glad there is a God in Heaven who had granted one of his daughters the power of discernment so that she may know that her, and her baby sister, will be safe and loved in their new home.

guy

Julia and Olivia--bonding day 12

2007-09-18T07:26:00.000-07:00

Morning washing of the streets-This is actually the pedistrian only street-Constitution Ave.

Old House

New house still under construction

Lunch is big here. We have yet to figure out how not to order too much when we are at a restaurant and I am not adventurous enough to order mystery meet kabobs from the street vendors. So big lunch it is. It is also a good thing we have to walk everywhere to help walk off the big lunches. Today we wandered for a while trying to find a store that we never found. That didn’t go over well with the boys. But Guy made amends by buying them ice cream.

Today’s big excitement was Jansen throwing up in the pool when we were swimming with Olia and Yulia. He actually caught it in his mouth! I didn’t know people could actually do that. Janse hopped out of the pool and made it to a trash can. Well, we all got out of the pool anyway and I wasn’t too worried because Janse has a sensitive stomach so this happens every now and then. He was fine and happy within a minute. I was just grossed out. I forgot to take picture of the girls today. I felt bad, but I wasn’t feeling well and was in cruise mode. When they left I just played it mellow and watched The Lucille Ball show DVD.

The interesting thing also was last night’s phone call from our interpreter, Igor. He called at 10:30pm and I was almost asleep. Our Regional Coordinator had just gotten through to him at a late hour and needed to know the names we will be giving the girls. Even though we had already decided on their names, it was weird to be pinned down. We are sticking with Americanizing their current names. Yulia will become Julia and Olia will be Olivia. We are not giving them middle names so that they can keep Perry as their middle name when they get married. I understand that, but am a little sad. I wanted to name them Julia Christine (my middle name) and Olivia Ann (Guy’s mom’s middle name,) but I guess in the long run of life, it will serve them better to be able to keep their maiden name. That is what Guy’s sisters have been able to do and Guy liked the idea. So Julia Perry and Olivia Perry it is. This will hold true unless we change our mind upon the American Readoption process. Which, by the way, is a cheap and easy process where you end up with legal copies of things, like birth certificates, in English.

Road Trip--Bonding Day 11

2007-09-17T08:51:00.001-07:00

The gang in the back of the van.

I’ve done my very best to keep my requests to a minimum, but felt strongly that I wanted to retrace the path that the girls have trod since being taken into custody by the state. After a few days of making the appropriate arrangements, my wish came true. Today, we hired a driver, piled everyone into the back of a VW van and hit the road. Our destination, Poloundino, to tour an orphanage for children aging from 3-7 years old 60 km to the north. The very place Olia had been sent after leaving the temporary shelter back in March. On the way out of town we picked up the girls at the RBS. Yulia was waiting by the gate out by the roadway when we pulled up. We hadn’t shared our plot with the girls as we wanted it to be a surprise. Indeed, it was.

Poloundino is a small town of 1500 people, give or take. There’s not much between Petro and Poloundino except wheat fields, lakes and birch trees. The terrain is absolutely flat and the earth blatantly fertile. The dirt is a thick with a beautiful dark tone like the pictures you see in the gardening magazines. Small wonder the tomatoes taste so good. As we drove north, we saw signs to Omsk, Russia, a city of 2.5 million people just across the northern Kazakhstan border. If we would have had the proper paper work,we would've made a run for it.

About 40 minutes into our journey we took a right off the highway and the road quickly turned into dirt with potholes, like landmines, demanding attention. Shortly, a very large, straight and well fortified railway needed to be crossed. Igor, our translator, announced “Trans Siberian Railway.” A quite hush came over the van, broken only as I heard Debbie whisper to Denver, “Trans Siberian Railway not Trans Siberian Orchestra."

We continued down the road lined by very small homes in serious disrepair, complete with towering woodpiles nearby. A reminder that long nights of winter are not far distant. It wasn’t long before the building came into view. It would be hard to miss. Very big, brick, with a yard full of children’s play equipment surrounding both sides visible to us. We entered through a large locked gate and promptly parked to the rear next to the "old school" fire equipment.

Olia rushed off the moment the door flew open. As we attempted to follow, I realized that there was something very quiet about this place. I mean, it was supposed to be full of young active children and the whole place looked, and sounded, deserted. We were escorted to the huge play room and asked to wait until the director showed up who would then give us a tour of the facility. The kids made quick work of destroying the neat and tidy play room as we killed some time. It was large, well lit, completely immaculate, and had some great stuff. Even Dad got some big boy fun in before the Director made his appearance.

The boys attempt to "one up" their father.

Introductions were made and the tour commenced. All of the children except “Camera Man Cade” remained in the play room as we were shown, room by room, both floors of the non living area. First were the toilets, the nicest we had seen thus far and the pride of the orphanage. Next was the music room, indoor garden room, speech therapy rooms, party room, infirmary, temporary quarters, directors and staff offices, and everyone’s favorite “Sensory Room” that Cade quickly named the Disco room. The windows were covered making the room dark, disco ball hanging from the ceiling and every kind of weird funky lighting option on display. Bean bags on the floor and other make shift beds where one could lie on the floor, stare at the ceiling, watch things spin, and get sick as you experienced “Sensory Overload”.

Disco Room.

Of course, what we really wanted to see were the 52 children who live at this facility, Olia just having moved out only a matter of weeks ago. The very children, to this point, I was convinced did not exist. We were told they were just waking up from nap time and would be headed out for some play time as the walked us towards the door. Thankfully, Olia announced she had really wanted to say goodbye to her “family” to which the Director just couldn’t say no. He motioned for us to follow as we walked down the hallway, Olia holding his hand. She’s a professional.

Oila's former family.

The children finally came into view and, to my surprise, were fully awake and dressed, just very, very quite and…. small. The looked miniature but ever so cute. Olia, the towering giant, made introductions, showed us around the place, and chatted with her care giver for a few minutes. The children looked on and listened intently, quite as church mice. Cade showed them the video screen to the camera as he filmed, their eyes got really big and they flashed a big smile but made no sound. Goodbyes were finally in order. She made sure everyone got a hug as she said goodbye. We then ventured out the play grounds to find one remaining care giver that Olia really wanted to see. Once found, Olia gave her the low down about her new parents, America, and brothers as more children listened on. Big hugs and more goodbyes. No doubt, love had been mutually shared and now thankfully, witnessed. As we loaded back into the van, I told the group I was so glad that we were able to make the trip. A phrase I found myself repeating over and over the entire evening.

guy

Raw Meat and Spare Parts-Bonding Day 10

2007-09-16T07:20:00.000-07:00

The Three Stooges

Today peace reigned supreme and we all went to the market. Cade finally got his hat! We wondered around the market for a little while and found two interesting things. First of all we went into building we hadn’t gone in before and it was obvious that it was the food building. It kind of smelled a little funny which made me a little apprehensive. What are they selling in here? Well, at the other side of the building, they were selling a whole lot of raw meat! That’s right, raw meat of all kinds just hanging there in two big areas. The meat tables were set up in a big square with the workers and scales on the inside and big signs with pictures of the type of meat being sold along with Russian and Kazakh word for the animal. It looked really gross. I am definitely not used to the sight of that, but I will say that the quality of the meat looked pretty good. I wish I knew how to ask if it was grass fed and free range. But the sight of it was still kind of turning my stomach a bit and I questioned the whole non refrigeration thing going on.

Fire up the barby baby!

This little piggy went to market...

After leaving that building we went looking for a “bike/car part” section of the market that Guy had seen earlier in the week on a morning run. We had a tough time finding it and then gave up. But as we were walking towards the place we were going to have lunch, there it was! It was just on the other side of the market and of course Guy had to scope it out. It was the craziest conglomerate of used and rusted parts I had ever seen for cars and bikes. Every man’s dream I suppose to have a garage full of that! I was just glad we weren’t at home because Guy would have probably walked off with his very own box of odd and ends “just in case” the neighbor needs a spare something or other for the old mower he doesn’t have yet.

One man's trash...is another man's trash!

By the time we got back to the hotel, the girls came. We did some more alphabet, numbers and new, to today, were greetings. Then we went to the amusement park again and rode a couple of rides. The boys were big enough to ride these kid sized four wheelers and man they really haul! We did the bumper cars as a family and no one died although I was in the car with Yulia and she ran head on into the steel railing like three times. I though my head was going to pop off! Then Guy finally got to ride the speedy grownup go carts he has been eyeing for 10 days now. They are crazy fast like all the other Kazakh rides and you get 5 minutes of drive time per turn. There is a double seater car so Janse and Denver got to have a turn, while Cade and Igor, our translater got to ride in their own cars. A total man fest! We then all walked back to the hotel and said good bye for the day to the girls.

Kazakh school of driving. Seatbelts optional.

Denver's post

2007-09-16T06:42:00.000-07:00

Some people thought Denver looked Russian, now he really does!

Today Janse, Dad and I went to the market to get a hat. We ate at the Black Jack. That’s a place to eat and then went to the market. I got a brown hat and Janse got a black hat and then we went back to Black Jack to pick up soup and then went to the hotel and Cade wanted a hat, but he didn’t do his homework so he won’t get his until tomorrow. Then the girls got to come over to the hotel and we got to go to a mini market and got some food and then went down to the gym and played ping pong, basketball and played with balloons.

Black Jack Cafe=Yummy chicken soup

Russian Hats and Rays of Sunshine--Bonding day 9

2007-09-15T00:06:00.000-07:00

Bring on the snow 'cause this cool daddy is ready!

Well, another day of unfriendly homework experience. Cade(and I) got to stay here while Denver, Jansen and Guy went to the Market on their own to get Russian hats. Guy used his limited Russian and keen negotiating skills to buy some hats without an interpreter. Okay so the lady was actually honest and quoted him the same price as the day before, but hey, it all worked out. The boys paid for half of the purchase and Guy footed the other. Guy was also nice enough to haul bag a big glass jar of that yummy chicken noodle soup from Black Jack Cafe. Meanwhile, back at the Skiff Ranch, Cade pouted and didn’t want to do his Algebra. Is this possible? The son of a former math and science teacher? Or is it the whole 12 going on 21? Either way, when he finally decided to finish the homework, he did really well. At least he gets it, ehh?

By the time the girls got here at about 2:30, I was still trying to cool off. I was seriously ready to break down and cry the whole hour before as I was thinking, “I can’t even handle the ones I have now much less two more!” I am hoping this is normal and I haven’t felt this way yet. Of course, as soon as they came into the hotel room, I was calmed right down and my fears went away. I love my boys with all my heart and my whole life revolves around my family. I was comforted today to know that even when the going gets rough that more children will only be a blessing. This way, I suppose, if I am upset with a couple of them, then there are more to brighten the day. If they all revolt? Well, then it is time for date night, chocolate and nice long morning run. In reality, all of our kids are really good kids. Guy and I have little to do with that and none whatsoever with Yulia and Olia. We are absolutely being extremely blessed with girls coming to our home at an older age that are sweet, affectionate, smart, fun and beautiful. What an amazing addition to our boys and today they provided a ray of sunshine when I really needed it.

We did some miscellaneous things today when Yulia and Olia where here. Igor brought me the log book from the boarding school. I have to write an “official” entry of what we do together for everyday we visit so I had about 7 entries I had to do and then poor Igor had to translate them. Meanwhile, all the kids worked on a craft I brought from the U.S. They made a bunch of felt fish. We put up the Perry school of crafty fish on the entertainment center. They all enjoyed that and then we did more numbers today. We also played in the gym and went to the little store by the hotel. Actually there are like 5-6 “little stores” within 200 meters of the hotel. More on this later.

A quite kid moment-rare, but good

Perry school of crafty fish

After dinner Scott, the dad of the other American family, stopped by with his 5 year old son Ben and chatted for a bit while Ben made a crafty fish too. Then it was time for bed and here we go again tomorrow. If we are lucky, Cade will get his act together and be able to get himself a hat at the market too!

deb

Ground Hog Day--Bonding Day 8

2007-09-14T04:02:00.000-07:00

The swimsuit model pose.

Much like the movie Ground Hog Day, our daily routine varies little from day to day. The boys are up about 7ish and are responsible for either reading or writing in their journals before breakfast. Breakfast starts at 8am, and generally consists of yogurt, fruit, omelets, cream of wheat, breakfast sandwich, and fruit juice. Then it’s back to our room where they boys enact civil disobedience over the fact that their homework just won’t go away. Some days have been pure torture. Fortunately, the groove is getting deeper and it not as easy to climb out. The consequences are also getting more severe. Cade finished his keyboarding assignment yesterday while the family swam together. It was good lesson for the girls as we explained why he was unable to go with us.

By the time the homework ritual is over it’s time for lunch. We’ve done everything from eating the goods available at the local outdoor market (this can be risky) to eating at a nice sit down restaurant. Sitting down takes time and a lot more money. There is a version of American fast food in town called the Doner Café, short for McDoner. The nice part is the menu has pictures which makes ordering very easy. We walk everywhere we go and some days log several miles which has also caused contention with the boys at times. Cry me a river!

The girls generally show up sometime between 2:30 and 3:00. We review the alphabet and numbers and feed them a snack. This seems to be a highlight for Olia. She loves the fruit, yogurt and is always asking about the little chocolate candy, M&M’s. Yesterday we told her she would need to wait until another day. She made a cute pouty face.

Yulia and the "3 musketeers."

We swam in the hotel pool today and discovered the girls really enjoy swimming even though neither can actually swim. The swimsuits we brought fit perfectly and they loved the goggles. Yulia is confident enough to stay in the shallow end and tries really hard. With a few lessons she will be just fine. Olia, on the other hand, is scared to death of the water and will not let go of you or the pool floaty. I made her share the pool floaty with her bothers to which she responsed with a small tantrum. I guess the honeymoon is finally over and she earned a few minutes in timeout at the side of the pool. It was funny; she really wanted to jump back in but couldn’t by herself, making the same cute pouty face as she served her time. The pool is chilly and we warmed up in the sauna, discovering the showers in the pool area are much better than the shower in our room. Guess, I’ll be swimming a lot from now on. By 5:00 the girls need to be headed back to the RBS which gives us enough time to rest and get ready for dinner at 6:00.

Wet hair and cold bodies.

Dinner isn’t as yummy as breakfast but it’s still very much eatable. Lots of heavy bread, chopped beef and Russian salads. There are 2 other sets of Americans staying at the hotel. A couple from California is adopting a 6 month old baby girl from the baby house. They, along with their 5 year old son Ben, have been here a week longer than us. Two ladies, April and Laura, are involved with the Antares Foundation and arrived a couple of days ago. They spend their days going from place to place delivering gifts and supplies to all the different orphanages in North Kazakhstan. Dinner is the time we share our adventures for the day. Afterwards we head back for a quick movie or relaxing and get ready for bed. I don’t think the boys have made it past 9:00 pm yet.

We paid the bill for the hotel today. As the translator said, "You can buy a car with that money!" They have flat fee for the room and one person and offer a discount of 15% if you pay for over 20 days. Which we did. Then add a upcharge for each person, offering no breaks for the kids. Add a reservation fee, laundry service and internet connection by the minute and Voila' $463,050 Tenge. I let you do the math while I lick my wounds. That may leave a mark.

guy

Pretty Clothes for Pretty Girls, Bonding Day 7

2007-09-12T23:44:00.000-07:00

Olia and Yulia in new outfits

Finally, I got to shop for a girls outfit! We got some shoes yesterday at the market, but that wasn’t nearly as fun as picking something out today. We went down to the Iceburg where they have a small grocery store and other small shops. We forgot to put the battery back in the camera so a picture of the facility will have to come later. The only downfall of the Iceburg was that there wasn’t much selection in the two shops that had children clothes and the prices were not that good. But, hey, I will take what I can get for now and all of a sudden the word MALL takes on a whole new meaning for me. I am sure that will wear off though considering I really don’t like to shop much. And I will really need help from all you girls(young and old) at home in picking stuff out because I just haven’t been paying attention to the latest fashion (like I ever have anyway.)

Love the shoes! Guy approved

Yulia and Olia liked their new clothes. I don’t know how much Olia likes pants because she usually wears skirts. I guess they have to wear Uniforms everyday at the Boarding School when they go to class. They can change after and Olia still chooses skirts. Yulia already wears pants and actually has a couple of cute shirts. And everyday since we got here, they wear their necklaces that we gave them on that first bonding day. They touch them and look at them a lot. Special thanks to Peggy Wheelwright for helping me make those and then gifting them to me. Very special and was an absolutely perfect way for us to help them understand that we are here to stay. We also showed the girls your picture, Peggy, and let them know you were the artist behind the creation.

After we tried on clothes, we went to the gym and played ping pong and balloons. They both came back happy and sweaty. However, I can say that, at the moment, it looks as though Olia is a girly girl. She really loves the Petshops and she asked if we had dolls. She is just so giggly and a little pouty. Then there is the skirt thing, too. Uh Oh, what are we to do with a girly girl? I would have to say that she is just adorable and very cuddly. Yulia is more into the physical activity and more serious minded. That is something I understand a little more.

Playing Ping Pong and balloons(above)in the Gym at the Skiff

Tomorrow we will go swimming. I showed them their swimsuits that we got before we came and they are excited. It will be fun!

Waste Not, Want Not

2007-09-12T08:58:00.001-07:00

Local water pump

Americans, and in many cases, ugly Americans, have a strong desire for things to be just so and to remain as such every time they visit. For instance, Disneyland. Clean, neat and manicured. And shocking, more so than my first impression of Petropavlosk. Please don't misunderstand, I like the IDEA of neat (and Mickey Mouse.) At its core, neatness, is a solid concept. But experience has taught me the costs of "neat" are high. And anytime you fly in the face of entropy you pay dearly. Nevertheless, we press on, drawn by Costco’s neat, but over packaged goods, cutting our lawns, twice, in a diagonal criss-cross, purchasing ipods to match our cell phones to match both our car and bike, etc. In most cases, taking no thought to the cost or long term ramifications of garbage cans overflowing with useless trash and lawn clippings or water drained from our reservoirs by showers that run for endless minutes while the water temperature rises to our perfect liking. Hey, I’d be lying if I said I never grabbed a hand full of napkins at the local fast food joint that I knew was more than a small nation could ever use. My curiousity, and hypocrisy, know no bounds.

Life in Kazakhstan doesn’t give you as many options for neatness as I'm used to. There isn’t time, energy or room for waste. Garbage cans simply don’t exist. This whole paradigm shift eliminates a lot of the unnecessary activities we Americans spend a large portion of our day fussing with. If you are lucky enough to own a car you are happily condemned to a perpetual state of exterior filth. Decisions like hot wax or under carriage wash not needed. Sidewalks and roadways are in serious disrepair with dirt being a common paving ingredient. Very eco friendly. Safety inspections for vehicles are unheard of and capacity of a bus is literally as much as can be stuffed inside without dropping the transmission. Survival of the fittest. Emissions, are you kidding? Folks here are smart enough to be realize the earth is warming but not foolish enough to think the humans are capabable of determining the fate of Mother Earth. The bicycles we've seen are literally from the pages of National Geographic complete with wobbling wheels and creaking cranks. Even in the heart of the city, water is being drawn from the local watering hole, carried in buckets usually by women who look to be 150 years old. Completely blind and deaf to the fact she just crossed the street in front of a Kazak Yuppie driving a new gas guzzling Porsche SUV. Signs of wealth and waste are evident, from time to time, but for the most part remain only a part of the lifestyles of the rich, famous or corrupt.

When you are powerless to make change happen at the macro level then life forces you change at the other end of the spectrum. Money seems to be the only facilitator of this change. Those who have a little money try to makeup for what they don’t have by dressing themselves or their children in high fashion, eating with china and real silverware, or remodeling the inside of their apt with trinkets from the local flea market. Those who haven’t any “means” are living, as they have for hundreds of years, in survival mode and learning patience in its truest form.

And then there’s us, the local American tourists, hunkered down at the nicest hotel in town, complete with 24 hr security. All the while sipping bottled water, and living above the law. If the Hotel Skiff is good enough for the President of Kazakhstan’s daughter, it’s good enough for Americans. Certainly not a five star hotel by our standards, but an oasis in the desert of destitute that surrounds us on all sides. Our room is spacious with incredible lighting and nice furniture, complete with laundry and maid service. Bathroom and shower are separate with hot water on demand. The room is well equipped with a small fan that acts as our sole source of air conditioning. We have the only direct access to the roof which provides endless opportunity for hours of entertainment and excellent vantage of the daily dumpster raid by the less fortunate. The hotel also has a pool that is swimable, dawning the proper swim cap, traditional speedo and goggles, of course. Debbie and I have utilized the weight room, and the entire family the basketball court on several occasions. We eat both breakfast and dinner at the hotel as the price of our room includes the meals and only leaves lunch to provide awkward meeting with the locals in attempt to decipher the menu. Numerous small convenience stores are a very short walk in either direction where we purchase water and necessities of life like m&ms’s, ice cream, fruit and yogurt. We’ve roamed the city daily in search of odds and ends, feel safe and have been treated nicely by the locals. On the flip side, crime here is bad. Theft and homoicide being the choice of disobedience, cheap Russian vodka a major contributor. We have gladly heeded the advice of our translator.

Only an unwise American would venture out after dark.

guy

To Market To Market--Bonding day 6

2007-09-11T05:00:00.001-07:00

Today we ventured to the market to get some shoes for the girls. The market is probably very similar to others in other countries. At this one they sell everything from clothing and shoes, to makeup, toys, material, fake and real fur, car and bike parts, school supplies and etc. There is an inside portion and an outside portion. The prices inside are quite a bit higher. Some of the merchandise is a little better quality, but Nadia says that it is because they pay more to be inside. Each booth is only about the size of a small walk in closet and crammed with goods. Some serious knockoffs going too. We got a pair of shoes for Yulia that were a knockoff of PUMA and instead they said RUMA. They were about $6 and pink! For a while, little Olia was a little stressed because we kept walking around and not buying shoes. She didn’t understand that we had to find the right size, which was really hard, and something cute that was also sturdy so they could play in the gym without slipping. They had a ton of really cute women’s and girls dressy shoes and boots I will say. Just cross your fingers that one of those cute pairs of black boots will find its way back into my luggage and goes home with me.

Yulia's "ruma's"

As was typical, the price doubled when they realized we were American. It was really cool that we had Nadia with us. She would get mad at them and remind them that they had already told her that the price was half. Then they would get aggravated and relent. It is just hilarious that it is all so predictable (in many countries.) Nadia also reminded us to keep a sharp eye out for our money so nobody would pick-pocket it. We all have on pants that have velcro and zipper pockets, so we are good. Then on our way out some Kazakh looking middle age man came up to Guy and started smiling and talking Russian really fast. When Nadia caught up she said that the man had never seen an American before. So this man shook Guy’s hand and was just so excited. Guy just stood there looking terribly non trusting and wondering if he was after something. Apparently not, because he walked off smiling just glad to meet an American.

Typical market

On the way back from the market, the kids got ice cream. We have to walk everywhere so the mile walk to the market by the time we came back was getting hot and long. And poor Yulia had missed her snack so she was starving. The hardest thing for me right now is really not knowing what they are feeling without an interpreter and also that they, especially Yulia, won’t say if they need something because they don’t want to complain or whine. But you could definitely tell by the look on Yulia’s face that she was not doing well. Poor thing. She got a hot dog snack as we left the market and of course the ice cream helped, too. We also discovered that Olia is a messy eater like Denver. And likes food just as much.

Deb

Olia digging in to the ice cream

Visit with social worker at RBS-Bonding Day 5

2007-09-10T04:37:00.000-07:00

The Supply Room at RBS.

Olia and her Play-Doh snail.

Pretty bows and pretty girls.

"The truth shall make you free, but first it will make you angry."

I had fully expected to be shocked and then outraged when I finally got the real scoop on the girls background. Instead, I was overwhelmed with the timing of it all and at peace with the entire situation. Back in January, when we felt prompted to get our paperwork started, the birth parents of the girls where having theirs parental rights simultaneously relinquished by the state. The father was unable to attend the proceeding due to incarceration (for the past 7 years) and the mother failed to show, her whereabouts remaining unknown even now. After the hearing, the girls where sent to the temporary shelter here in Petro until sometime in March when Yulia was transferred to the RBS and Olia to Poulindino some 60 km to the northeast. That was especially hard for Olia as she missed her older sister greatly.

It takes 6 months for the children to become available for adoption according to local law, so sometime in June the girls became officially available. Olia turned 8 in early August which then made her eligible to also be placed at the RBS, something that happened only shortly before we showed up. That was a happy day for both of them.

The social worker had many nice things to say about both of them as well as the bonding that she has witnessed both in person and from the things the girls have been saying to others at the RBS. She also made a point to say she feels the girls have weathered the storm about as well as could be expected. Finally, she shared her amazement that we felt so strongly that we needed to add these 2 girls to make our family complete.

I think the amazing thing is that life for us with the 3 boys was full steam ahead when sometime around the first of the year we felt a tug pulling us another direction. And it was very obvious it was 2 tugs and not 1. For that piece of inspiration I will forever be grateful. Since that time we have prayed specifically that our girls will watched over, protected and cared for and that we would be led directly to them

Our visit today was just as wonderful as any of the others. Reviewed the alphabet, played play-doh, toured more of the RBS, and had a nice walk outside. The really enjoy going for walks outside, further evidence they have been placed in the right home. Today was also the first day that someone had done their hair. Both of them had well placed bows to match their necklace that we had given them on our first visit.

Tomorrow we will visit the local market with them and do some shopping for new shoes. Now, that's some shopping I think I can handle.

guy

Balloons and Yogurt-Bonding Day 4

2007-09-09T21:31:00.000-07:00

Yogurt in the "family room"

Quiet play on the roof

Door from SKIF hotel room out onto the roof

Just as promised, the girls showed up promptly at the appointed time and as the door flung wide open I knew the shyness of being together as family was a thing of the past. Our translator said they were waiting at the gate when he picked them up and had very detailed discussion about how much fun they had yesterday as they drove to the hotel. We were treated to hugs and love before we settled into our first official English lesson. We sat around the table and reviewed the alphabet cards, singing the accompanying alphabet song, and dealt the cards for a game of “GO FISH”. The girls are still trying to remember the boys name so part of the game was to call the person name and say “Do you have…?” Immediately, Olia’s age, lack of official schooling and personality helped her shift more quickly into the groove of the whole thing. Yulia, on the other hand, was more reserved only wanting to speak if she new she would not be wrong. Her accent is also thicker. “Deen-ber, do you ha-VVE?” It is very cute and somewhat funny only she doesn’t think so. One long game was enough and a break was needed.

Yesterday we gave them each a balloon to take home and we discovered that only Yulia’s survived the night. A closet here at the hotel serves as our stash of goodies and when they discovered more balloons were available it was "game on! " The hotel here has a basketball court along with a weight room and swimming pool and although not fancy by American standards very much adequate for our purposes. We played basketball, table tennis, volleyball, and chased balloons all over. A good time was had by all. After which we retired to our room for a quick drink of water and headed out onto the roof for some relaxing. The girls had re-discovered the Petshops toys and for the next 30 minutes played together quietly. This quiet play is a phenomenon that that we have been told happens often with girls, but had never witnessed. It was marvelous. More and more I’m beginning to pick up on Russian words that give me clues as to the “gist” of the conversation. It was so nice just to listen and attempt to join them in their world.

Time began to run short and we decided a quick snack of yogurt was in order. The yogurt here is absolutely marvelous. Much better than anything I have tasted in the US. In fact, most of the food here is great. Lots of cucumbers and tomatoes, fruits and fruit juices, heavy breads, and chicken, beef and my personal favorite pork. Far and away, breakfast is the highlight of the day. Speaking of food, I was told not to long ago by a good friend that you would be amazed what will come out of a teenagers mouths when you start to feed them. Well, in Kazakhstan it works on the younger children as well. No sooner did Olia take her first bite of yogurt she started talking about her birth mother and father. I didn’t take long until I realized she was referring to us a “Mama and Papa Amerikee” and her parents as “Mama Taunya and Papa” something or other. Finally I asked the translator what she was saying, and with a long pause as he finished listening to what she was saying, he said “Wow, she knows a lot.” She knows, or thinks she knows, more than I care to share at this point but I did get a chance to question her further who taught her that "Boys are to protect girls". She said, one for her "Drunk Uncles" had taught her and moreover "Boys are not to hit girls" either. I felt odd about reinforcing her drunk Uncle but took the high road anyway. And for good measure threw in the fact the "Papa Amerikee" didn't drink, to which she responded "Neither did Mama Taunya, but Papa Amerikee is nice." I'm not sure if that made me feel better or worse.

Fortunately today we have our rescheduled appointment with the Social Worker at the RBS. Our main objective is to impress upon her mind that, despite what she has to share with us, nothing changes from our perspective. We want the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

guy

Maskito Atack--by Janse

2007-09-08T20:23:00.000-07:00

The aftermath of the maskito atack.

We have bine in the hoettell for three days. I had a maskito atack. I have maskito bits hvriwar (everywhere) on me an it fet like the chicken pocs. And I stil havam so I tooc panincril (Benadryl) so dos it ich inimor (anymore) now ther is maskitos everiwar in the hottell we are killin all of the maskitos in the hottell. And the hoettell has a swimming pole and a jim. I hate maskitos and my sisters are visiting us at the hoettel to day. We gowin to the mosmit (amusement) park. It is like loogn bot u can racd with foorwills (four wheelers). It is asam (awesome) and I crast and my sit fle af (seat flew off) and it was fofi (funny) and on bomr (bumper) cars was fonj (fun) pcas they have no sitbilt (seatbelts) and thers a tin (thing) like th titl waf (tidal wave) bot it I ronb and it spins it is cool. I like this plas it is asom and cool.

Janse

Bonding Day 3-Together as a family

2007-09-08T19:00:00.000-07:00

Jansen,Denver,Olia,Yulia,Cade

Today is the day we have been waiting for for a very long time! Nadia, our translators wife, brought Yulia and Olia to us here at the hotel. Nadia also can translate and it was great to have her here with us. When the girls got here there were of course hugs and kisses to Papa and Mama and then time to meet the boys. Now the boys being boys, where out playing on the roof and exploring what looked like an old bucket of tar. Being on the roof is not a big deal because there is a door from our family room area that goes out to it. The tar though, hmmm. Anyway, we walked out onto the roof with the girls and the boys came on over to give out some awkward hugs. The girls definitely were a lot more shy about this part than with us. But, it didn’t last too long. It is absolutely amazing how trusting that all our children are. No one has been scared or shy (for very long.)

Following Yulia’s wishes, we stayed in the room for a little while and did a couple of different activities. The first of which was playing on the computers. The girls loved it and were, as usual, quick to learn. Then, they spent some time playing with balloons and Petshops. Olia really liked the Petshops. It wasn’t too long before they were ready to go out and go to the amusement park that the boys had gone to two days before.

Walking down to the amusement park was my favorite part of the day. Cade, Jansen and Denver were so nice to lovingly and willingly hold hands with Yulia and Olia. It was so very cute. At the park, everyone got a turn to choose a ride for everyone to go on. I thought for sure that the Kazakh, no holds bar, no safety standards bumper cars were going to give all the kids some serious whiplash. The girls loved it though so I didn’t worry. But, then there was the whole spinning Kazakh version of the Tidal Wave fiasco. This is a ride where you get swung back and forth like a pendulum and then the place where you sit also spins. It doesn’t spin too fast, thank goodness, but it does spin so it is hard to focus on anything in particular. The boys loved it and the girls…not so much. We just held hands and Olia did her best not to cry. Yulia sat there very brave and holding on to me for dear life. Why do men/boys think it is so funny to see women/girls scared? Very aggravating and all I can say is that in the future you will find us women on the nice little train through Lagoon Park while the boys spin their brains out. So there!

It wasn’t long before we had to go back and wait until tomorrow to be together. But now we have permission to see the girls here everyday, so we are very happy about that. And now it is time to start some daily English lessons.

As for the experience of seeing them meet, it kind of goes along with other events in the trip. I am not reacting as emotionally as I thought I would. It just feels like watching something finally come to pass that I have indeed be emotionally wrapped up in for 9 months now. Some of it is kind of surreal too. Emotions ebb and flow, but for me, flow upon times of reflection.

Deb

The Blossoming of a Kazak Rose

2007-09-08T01:09:00.000-07:00

The first time I met Olia in person was in a business meeting. She sat at the table next to me while we discussed her future with a group of people I never before had met. Seems like such an odd way to get to know someone. Indeed, it was odd. For both of us. And, looking back, I think she was understandably nervous and down right scared. That made two of us. In contrast, her older sister was poised, holding nothing back; answering all the questions and providing the moral support all the while. Olia only commented here and there with a few “Da’s”, Russian for yes. Until the moment when she got a question that really mattered to her, “What do you think about having brothers?” the translator asked. “Brothers,” she said, “Are for protecting sisters”. Now, if I was lecturing my boys AGAIN on the aspects of brotherhood, I could not have said it better myself. Except, from her I could feel the sweetness and sincerity of her tone that I lack. Truly she was an angel delivering a godly sermon, trapped in an 8 year old body. She then continued to string several sentences of beautiful Russian together and deep inside I knew we had turned our first corner.

Our first two days with the girls were so delightful. We spent all our time at the RBS, like an anthropologists in the rain forests of the Congo, trying to understand them and their environment. I guess, more than anything, we are hoping to gather clues about their circumstances that might allow us to help them in the future. Immediately, Olia was attached to Debbie and more than anything just wanted to be held. By the second day she was talking so fast that the translator, more or less, gave up trying to cover everything she said. Occasionally, I would grab her hand, give her a hug, but only to find that through a course of time she found her way back to her mother. I guess it’s only natural for a girl that age to want to be with her Mother, but what she was really looking for, and probably needing, was Mama. And Mama’s are for holding their daughters. And because the supply of food in her new found home has been good for her, I was happy to oblige.

Yesterday we met as a family for the first time and our little Angel took another step forward. She spent most of our time either holding my hand or the hand of one of her brothers. Jansen, of course, seemed to be her brother of choice; just as we suspected. He was so sweet and nurturing to her and they made a connection that I suspect with last throughout their lives. Age wise Denver is 3 months the younger and Jansen 6 months the older. Certainly, this new addition to our “2 musketeers” is the missing piece of the puzzle.

My dear Olia, as a brother with 3 younger sisters I could not agree more. Brothers are indeed for protecting sisters.

I’m not sure exactly why but the days here have been wearing me out and by 7 pm I’m bushed. Last night, I think I made it until 8:30 before I gave up the ghost. Shortly after I dozed off of the phone rang. Debbie responded to the call and I heard her say, “Yes, yes, yes! Oh, that is wonderful!” Igor, our translator, had spoken with the folks at the RBS and permission had been granted for the girls to visit us off-site for the remaining of our bonding period. Wonderful doesn’t even begin to describe it.

guy

Beyond Bonding, Day 2

2007-09-07T18:52:00.000-07:00

Olia working on the princess picture.

Yulia jumping rope in her classroom.

Kola eating a really good meal at the Regional Boarding School

"Princessas" by Yulia(left) and Olia(right)

The Regional Boarding School (RBS), as it officially named, is a state funded institution and is home to as many as 200 orphanages, ages 8-18, at any given time. The number of children ebbs and flows as birthdays, adoptions, and other situations create vacancies. Ironically enough, only 10% of the orphaned children living there at any one time are cleared for the adoption process. A few remaining children, through a process of time and many unfortunate circumstances, will become available but most, for various reasons, will remain off the adoption registry their entire stay at the facility.

My false expectation of this fortress we reinforced the moment I laid eyes on the four story brick building and further confirmed when the grand wooden entry doors creaked, groaned and eventually slammed loudly behind us as entered.

Three trips to the facility have come and gone and to my discovery what the RBS really becomes is a cross between a well oiled machine and a masterpiece of humanity, with adults from the outside acting as Caregivers (Mother and Father) over a family of 20 boys and girls. They live, eat, and act as complete families equipped with bedrooms, a family room, study area, computer and closets. Some of the highlights for the children are the family activities they periodically are able to participate in (Olia’s family will be attending the circus this evening). Staffed with full time cooks, teachers, hairstylists, a social worker, medical staff, and administrators its halls are a constant buzz of activity. The children attend class as many as 6 days week, have extracurricular activity options such as music after school, and spend the summer at an off-sight camp. This, I am told, is the highlight of the year. The children have jobs and chores both inside and out. The older of which I witnessed painting window panes, scrubbing stairs and floors, and keeping everything ship shape. And for as old as the building appears to be on the outside the inside is remarkably tidy and clean with fresh paint lining the walls of the two classrooms we have entered. It does, however, have a unfamiliar smell. Not the un-disinfected smell I had anticipated like the childrens nursery at the local church. But a smell, I imagine, that is created when parents love themselves more than their children. Outside the grounds are large and spacious with gardens flowers, and although not very nice they have play equipment, soccer field, basketball court, green house, laundry facility, garage for repairs on the dilapidated bus, and a pig pen. Yes, they raise pigs for what purpose I was unable to discover.

Speaking of pigs, one of my main concerns was the food situation. Did they get enough? How was the quality? We’ve all heard the horror stories. Luckily yesterday, shortly after our visit started, Yulia announced it was “snack” time and because my curiosity has no bounds I asked if I could follow her. Well follow I tried as she promptly left me behind racing down the marble corridors and vanished out of site. When I found her she was already bellied up the table with 5 or 6 other children hurriedly eating her “snack”. I am certain she had to be mistaken about snack time because what was laid before me was as serious mid day meal. Chicken noodle soup, mashed squash, a huge meatball, bread of several sorts and juice. I sat at the table and quickly struck up light table conversion with my non English speaking companions. As we attempted to chat, I realized that the soup they were eating looked really, really good. Now, I had just recently eaten and wasn’t necessarily hungry, but wow, what did a guy have to do to get a bowl of that soup. Of course, they offered and I declined until, bless his soul, a younger boy presented me with hot steaming bowl of my own. No fight was made on my behalf and as I lifted the spoon in eager anticipation my taste buds were met with a wonderful surprise. Absolutely. Delicious. Yulia was cruising through her meal, scrapping the leftovers into the appropriate bowl for future use perhaps while I was savoring every bite. I think she may have even rolled her eyes when she realized I was holding up her life. Gratefully, she has yet to realize what she is dealing with me as her father and “Come hell or high water” I wasn’t leaving until every last drop was removed from the bowl and placed in my stomach. Luckily she acquiesced and made herself useful shooting 1 megabyte digital pictures of the all the children as I finished what may have been the best soup of my life. I’m still not happy about 1 megabyte pictures but it was worth the trade!

Snack Time with Yulia

We had another great visit that included a very detailed conversation with Yulia’s teacher about her abilities. Yulia read beautifully from Tom Sawyer (in Russian of course) drew a beautiful “Princessa” (Debbie’s favorite Subject) and showed her athletic ability by jumping rope, a gift we had brought for the girls. It was then had a stark realization. Olia and I have been staring into each others eyes every since we received the picture of her and to me she has been a part of the family for weeks now. Yulia, on the other hand, is all brand new. It’s only been three days since I first saw her and I find myself just staring at times trying to soak in who she really is. “Do I know you?” I keep asking myself, “You are so familiar to me.” She does have many features that resemble Cade and Janse; a seemingly perfect fit from an outsider’s perspective. But it seemed there was something more, something I was missing, and the moment she showed her true colors by jumping rope like it really mattered I knew exactly what I was dealing with. Debbie. My Debbie, whom I have picture of when she was 9 years old sitting on my dresser. I have stared at that picture for years wondering what it would be like to have known her as a child. Ladies and Gentleman we have a very driven, talented, and beautiful young lady who every day will remind me of what is like to live in the same house with my lovely wife.

Of course, all "earthly" good things come to an end and we gathered together to say our goodbyes. Yulia embraced me with a huge bear hug and gave me a kiss on the lips. I looked at her I without even thinking said, I love you Yulia and, in all honesty, I think she understood. Finally, as if it couldn’t get any sweeter, we were informed that tomorrow the girls received permission to come to our hotel and meet the boys.

This is only getting better!

guy

Bonding period begins—Sept. 6

2007-09-06T21:28:00.000-07:00

Olia-8 years old(last month)

The Girls--Yulia,Debbie,Olia

YULIA-9 almost 10(in Oct)

It was obvious within less that a minute that Yulia and Olia were very comfortable with the idea of a bonding period as they demonstrated it very openly. Guy and I were waiting in an empty classroom for them and when they came in they came right over to us and started hugging and kissing us and calling us mama and papa. I was very shocked and amazed as I did not expect this. Most parents report how the children usually take a little while to warm up to them especially in a physical way. The process can usually take days, weeks or months. This was just not the case today. For the two hours, the girls gave out countless hugs and many kisses. They wanted to hold our hand wherever we went. And we really went too! The girls took us around the orphanage and showed us where they went to class as well as where they lived. They were both talking like crazy and I wish I could have understood. Igor, our translator couldn’t keep up. I am so glad that they kept talking even though they knew we couldn’t understand. I hope it continues.

We also went outside and walked around where they had flower and vegetable gardens. Yulia played the piano for us and filmed some video footage. When we get some of our converters squared away with a special attachment, then we hope to get a little bit of video going. Yulia also took pictures. She really likes electronics and was quick to pick up how to use them.

Towards the end we played some UNO. Yulia already knew how to play and Olia picked up it up pretty fast. We practice having them say the numbers and the colors as we played. It was funny to see how competitive Yulia was. She really wanted to win. She also definitely knew the rules and some rules we didn’t know. I am just laughing at myself and Guy because in our minds we’re thinking, “so you want to win do ya? Well then sweetie, you’ve come to the right house.”

Olia was learning well, too. It is obvious however, that she is just starting school this year. She still behaves in that innocent and playful kindergarten kind of way even though she just turned 8. The director at the orphanage told us yesterday that she received two excellent marks that day in school, so I am sure she will be just fine in the long run. Since she just turned 8 at the beginning of August, Olia can still very legitimately be in the second grade or third grade. But, she is just starting learn the alphabet and such so there is a gap here in real grade level. I want to make sure both girls end up in the right grade based on age so that down the road there are not problems. Yulia will be fine I am sure going into the fourth grade. She is just really sharp and a go getter. I just have to figure out the best solution for Olia to catch her up to at least the second grade. Ideas anyone?

The boys got really spoiled today while we were gone. Meghan Griffin is a peace corp volunteer and was so nice to take them to the amusement park for a couple of hours while we visited with the girls. Meghan is way nice and reminds me a lot of Guy’s cousin Candace(you free and fun spirit you!) What a blessing that she was so willing and excited to help us today on her day off. We are all praying that very soon the director of the orphanage will let the girls come to our Hotel and be with the boys… By 7:30pm the boys had had it and went to bed. Of course, I am up with them right now at 5:00am the next morning. All in all, though, we have all been extremely blessed on the whole jet lag and travel thing. Not so lucky though on uploading anything media through the hotel phone line. Hopefully we will get to the internet café soon.

The Amusement Park--by Cade

2007-09-06T19:20:00.000-07:00

Today Denver Janse and I went to the little amusement park that they have here. We went because our mom and dad went to the orphanage and we can’t go yet. I don’t think it is fair that I can’t see someone that might become my sister. This very nice lady named Megan took us there. Megan is Peace Corps volunteer from Boston so it was easy to communicate. The amusement park is not very big but it still has some pretty cool rides like bumper cars and a four wheeling one. The bumper cars were the best they are a lot better than the ones in the U.S. They don’t have any type of safety devices on them and they are light weight so when you get hit you go flying and I almost tipped over. Also the four wheeling ride was my second favorite they hade real four wheelers that were the small kind made for little kids. You would ride on a track that they had there and all you wore was a helmet. There were some other rides that were cool too. I think that this has been one of the best parts of the trip yet.

Cade

Begging for Forgiveness.

2007-09-06T09:19:00.000-07:00

Americans are visual creatures and the advent of digital technology seems to have proprogated our fascinations with pictures. Admittedly, I share this fetish. Which is exactly why I proudly, and without apology, set our digital camera to shoot 8 meg pictures. Only the best, I say. Ditto, with the high resolution video camera. Sadly a 28k connection has us crippled. That coupled with the fact that a power converter without an adaptor magically becomes a door stop. Thus we have worn out our long lasting lithium ion batteries.

In summary, we went to the orphanage for 2 hours today. Shot some Emmy Award winning footage of our beautiful girls, met their friends, and toured the whole place but we are will be unable to share any of riveting action until we get the technical stuff straight. If my brother-in-law the computer nerd is reading this he'd say "Yeah, that's about par for the course." and would promptly remedy the whole thing with some duck tape all the while muttering under his breath, “Why was that so hard?”

Nevertheless, the orphanage was fascinating. I will post on this later. Debbie is planning on uploading pictures and talking about our first bonding experience. I'd be lying if I told it wasn't the quickest 2 hours of my life. The girls are so sweet and so excited. And us you might ask, we are computer disabled relying only a few battery cells fighting for their lives to record and remember for all you may be watching on.

Good thing I thrive on pressure. I will do better.

guy

A Man's Perspective--meeting the girls

2007-09-05T22:02:00.000-07:00

Since landing in Petro we had been whisked around by a driver in white 80’s vintage mini van, escorted in and out of meetings at time warp speed like some high level politician, had a translator explain why a family with 3 children would want more, met the daughters of my dreams, and checked into the “Americans” suite at the local hotel. All within one hour. The Hotel Skiff is great, but it the whole experience reminds me of the movie Hotel Rwanda, only it’s an island in a sea of “Kazak” craziness. In many ways I feel I’m cheating our experience by not being able to stay at the orphanage and walk a mile in there shoes, so to speak, nevertheless the farther we are pulled from American soil the gravity of our situation has been driven home. If the rewards of travel are to be found from venturing off the beaten path then we’ve hit pay dirt! The title of a new book written by Christopher Robbins adds some insight, “The Land that Disappeared: In Search of Kazakhstan”. Will someone tell Christopher we found it! Thankfully they have a 28.8k high speed internet connection, frequent but short rolling brown-outs, and hot water despite the lack of pressure. Now if I could just get the boys to enjoy our discoveries.

Speaking of simple pleasures, our few minutes with the girls was a amazing experience. One that I wonder if I will ever fully understand exactly what transpired and, yet, never forget. When the Orphanage Director announced that they would be bringing the girls in to meet us I almost died. I told the translator I hadn’t planned for a face to face encounter at this point, “What about pictures?” I said. Now, many of you know I’ve speculated on how the process might actually occur for months now and let me just say the moment the girls came in the room I was ill prepared. They were both beautiful with olive skin and hazel eyes. Both are slight of build and no attempt to dress them for the occasion or get them “all gussied up” was apparently made. From the onset Yulia was very confident and mothering to her younger sister and when she expressed that she had been teaching herself to play the piano I thought, “Naturally.” She held Olia’s hand and stroked her arm making frequent eye contact as if to say everything would be okay. Olia, the girl whom we had seen a picture of, was very timid and shy but ever so sweet. At one point, I believe she was asked to sit up straight as if to make a good impression, but it was short lived. As we spoke through the translator we began to catch a glimpse of their personalities. This was what I had been waiting for. Yulia is obviously mature beyond her years in many ways, and Olia quite the opposite. She seemed so innocent, so unsure. When I asked what they enjoy doing for fun they replied playing games like hide and seek and singing. Obviously, the simple pleasures in of life for them were indeed, simple. How I wish the boys could have been there to see their eyes light up and their big smiles as the talked about the summer camp experience and how happy they were to be back together again. I was amazed at how well spoken they seemed to be. They commanded the language at will and though I could not understand them, their speech was clean and eloquent unlike the adult’s conversation we had just been privy to. I could have listened to them speak Russian for hours; their sweet voices were music to my ears. As time wore on I reached over and touched Olia on the arm, to let her know not only was I hearing what she was saying but feeling it as well. A quick glance of the eyes was all I received in return. It was all I could do to fight back the urge to give her a hug and somehow transfer all the love I possessed.

The old adage a “short meeting is good meeting” certainly did not apply. Unfortunately, with the Dept of Education representative present, we were there after all, only to decide whether or not we liked what we saw enough to move forward OR move on. The girls were allowed to say goodbye, then dismissed, and walked arm-in-arm out the door. More than anything I just wanted to follow.

Truthfully, I didn’t like what I saw. Not one little bit. These children or any others for that matter, being forced to make the best of an awful situation. Let’s not be naive, the kids aren’t there because Dad won the Fathers Day award and Mom the baking contest. Life hasn’t been fair in many ways. I can tell this is getting very close to the part of the experience that I feared the most. Facing the realization that, despite all my efforts, adding two girls to our family is all I can do and may do nothing for the plight of the remaining children. I am hoping though, to interact with the other children and attempt to help them believe that there are other parents out there, somewhere, working towards a family that may include them.

It has been said, "The price of clarity is the risk of insult." With that in mind, gingerly I asked if they were absolutely confident if the girls were "clear" to be adopted and if there would be any foreseeable objections. They assured me they were "clear". My response, “Then we are clear.”

I suspect some might wonder how a decision like this could be make so quickly, in a crowded dingy room so far away. Truthfully, this decision was made long ago and our brief face to face encounter with the girls only allowed us to know for sure that our decision was in alignment with the heavens.

A day, a night and a day (and a night and another day)

2007-09-05T21:26:00.000-07:00

A day, a night and a day(and a night and another day.)

Much better than expected. That’s the long and the short of it. In summary here are the things that went well:

Short security lines everywhere.
Nothing taken from us in security. Whew!
The boys never whined, complained or had tantrums even when really tired.
Plenty of water and food.
The Ratatouille in Vienna airport was really good.
Discovered and ate “Mozart balls” recommended by Candace. They’re little round chocolate truffle balls. YUMMY.
Had time for a bus tour of Vienna. Wow!
Obviously made it through customs in Astana. The wait wasn’t too bad. We met another couple from adoption ark(Al and Paula) and chatted. They are lucky enough to be going to a small town where they will staying at the orphanage they are adopting from.
Survived WWII era plane ride from Astana to Petropavlovsk.
All of our bags made it the whole way and they were under weight limits so no extra charges.

The only stressful moment was getting the tickets squared away for our flight to Petropavlovsk. I bought them online before we left so I had an eticket confirmation. The lady at the air astana desk sent me to check in and then after waiting in line, the lady at the check in desk freaked out because we needed a paper ticket. So I had to go back to the airline desk(100 feet away.) They got yelled at by the check in lady for passing us along with no ticket. They were kind of confused about how we had already paid for the ticket and once they got it, the computer system wouldn’t work, so they had to hand write five tickets. Back at check in, it took way too long to get the boarding passes and get through security even though we were the only ones left to come through. Guy went through security first and made it to the bus to tell them we were coming. I got through security with the boys and headed to the gate only to be confused and panicked that I couldn’t find Guy. He was already through the gate door (which was very obscure) and holding the bus for us, but not `allowed to run back up the stairs to tell us where to go. The airline personnel had already abandoned the doorway so the boys and I were confused, I was freeked out and no one spoke English. Finally, Guy managed to stress to the airline lady that he HAD to back up the stairs to get us because he knew we would be lost up there. Whew! We made it to the bus and then carted out to the old WWII plane. It took about an hour for my cortisol levels to drop back down and relax, but I recovered and enjoyed the flight.

When we stepped off of the plane in Petropavlovsk, we had definitely entered another world (as if the plane wasn’t an early indicator.) But, truly everything here is reminiscent of oppressed Russian type of living interspersed with a changing economy and technology. As always though people rise above and our translator, Igor, was an instant reminder that laughter, kindness and friendship make everything else easy to deal with.

We are here and we found our girls!

2007-09-05T01:06:00.000-07:00

After 36 hours of travel, we went right from the Petropavlovsk airport to the office of education with our translater Igor and Regional Coordinator, Sholpan. That only took about 15 minutes to declare our intent to adopt two girls. We were then so very lucky to be able to be taken to the Regional Boarding School right after and meet with the director of the school, the social worker, an official from the office of education, Sholpan and Igor(quite a crowd, ehh?)We again had to officially declare our intent. Unfortunately, the boys had to stay out in the car with the driver for this part because after the formalities were over, they brought into the office our girls, Olia and Yulia!

This was an amazing experience. The love in the room was very strong from all those involved. Olia and Yulia were two very sweet and beautiful girls and Yes, they seemed familiar to me. There is so much we still don't know, but the most important fact is clear; Guy and I had instaneous love for the both of them and the spirit in the room confirmed that it was right.

We will begin our first visitation with them tomorrow. We don't have pictures yet since today was just a formal meeting. And the boys have not seen them either. I will also take time to post a couple things from our trip here. But, for now, we wanted everyone to know that we are safe and our girls were here waiting.

Where is Kazakhstan?-- video

2007-09-02T21:17:00.000-07:00

A quick Video that Cade helped me with just to give everyone a sense of where we are going.

We are leaving in the late morning and want to say thanks to all of our friends and family for their undying and unconditional support. So much genuine love and caring not only for us but for our girls whom none of us even know. Thank you Thank you!

Total area: 1,049,149.53 sq miles (2,717,300 sq km)
Land area: 1,030,809.78 sq miles (2,669800 sq km)
Comparative area:
- Ninth largest in the world, equivalent to the size of Western Europe.
- Four times the size of Texas.
- Five times the size of France.
Boundaries: Total 7,459 miles (12,012 km). The Republic of Kazakhstan shares its longest borders with Russia, 4,251 miles (6,846 km) and China, 951 miles (1,533 km), as well as with Uzbekistan 1,369 miles (2,203 km), Kyrgyzstan, 653 miles (1,051 km), and Turkmenistan, 235 miles (379 km). It also borders 1,183 miles (1,894 km) of the Caspian Sea.
Independence: December 16, 1991
National Holiday: Independence Day, December 16
Population: 15,2 million
Ethnic Diversity:
Kazakh 51.8%, Russian 31.4%, Ukrainian 4.4%, Tatar 1.7%, German 1.6%. There are over 100 other nationalities.
Religions: 46 religious confessions, including Muslims 47%, Russian Orthodox 44%, others, such as Roman Catholics, Protestants, Judaists at 9%. For more info click here
Languages: Kazakh, spoken by over 52% of the population, is the state language. Russian, spoken by two-thirds of the population, is used in everyday business and enjoys on offical status under the Constitution. Kazakhstan has a state program of promoting studies of English as the language of international affairs and business.

Our LOI is here! What it looks like.

2007-08-26T09:55:00.000-07:00

finally the LOI(Letter of Invitation) is here! We have no idea what it says since it is all in Russian, but as long as the Kazakhstan embassy in DC knows, then were are cool. From what we gather, there is a paragraph that probably says we are cleared to come on over to adopt and then the rest is just our personal information that is listed on our passports. That is why we had to get them emergency renewed. They didn't like Guy's passport expiring in March 08 and we also discovered that mine said that I was a male?! So when you pay enough money to licensed private passport agencies, they work with the government and get them processed within 24 hours. So we had that done, scanned them and emailed the scan to our agency who forwarded the scan to Kazakhstan on Wednesday the 15th(thursday their time.)
The LOI arrived on Friday, August 23rd. It was supposed to come thursday, but apparently the fax/scan machine was not working in Kazakhstan so it was delayed another day. After starting paperwork at the end of January, it will be the first of Sept until we travel. We will leave Monday sept 3rd at 1 in the afternoon from the Salt Lake City Airport and arrive in Petropavlovsk,Kazakhstan wednesday morning(tuesday night 10:30pm our time.) There will be 5 different planes and 4 layovers(including 6:30 hours in Vienna.) Quite a long travel plan, but what do you do when you are literally traveling half way around the world? The only thing we have left to worry about are the visas. Supposedly, they will surely be here by Saturday, but crazy things happen, so cross your fingers!

Never Say Never!

2007-05-25T14:08:00.000-07:00

The following letter was written about Feb 18th, 2007. It provides proof that life is an adventure that you can not write in advance!

All I can say is that for several years I thought our 3 boys were more than enough children. However, it has recently become obvious that our family unit was not complete. Therefore, Guy and I (and hopefully the kids) will be going to Kazakhstan sometime in the summer to adopt sibling girls. The process is going full steam ahead with contracts signed, paperwork filed, letters written and of course, money paid. Our whole family is very excited and it is already hard to wait. But, how did this happen?

Sometimes events come about in unexpected ways. There are some pieces to the puzzle that make sense now in retrospect. Guy has always wanted a girl in the family, but I really didn’t want another baby especially as the boys have gotten older and into school. But, over the last year and a half I have been the song leader at church for all the kids from 3-12 years old. It is the best job and the girls have really been melting my heart, especially the 3-4 year olds. A couple of them will just come and hug me out of the blue and even my friends’ 4 year old will run and jump into my arms. My friend is so amazed at her daughter’s attachment. Well, I guess they all sensed something before I did.

About 3 weeks ago, I was just sitting and thinking and then the thought came, “I keep telling myself that if one of those little girls needed a home I would take them in in a second so is that really true?” Well, many tears later, it was really true and not only that, Guy and I both felt that our family was missing not one, but two girls. So we fasted and we prayed and I can honestly say that it was so obviously the right thing to do that I can’t believe that I didn’t figure it out sooner. But, we all know timing is everything and God works in mysterious ways.

So then, for a little over a week we started the painstaking process of trying to find our girls. To make a long story short, there was a ton of research done with the local international adoption agency and online. After sorting through all the information on U.S. adoptions VS international and then going through the different countries, we realized that our girls are somewhere in Kazakhstan. We will be working with an agency in Illinois called Adoption Ark. They are really great and the best part is that the many people involved in this process feel the same way we do. They know that God loves all his children and that He will lead us to our girls so we can bring them home. We will be going to Kazakhstan not knowing who the girls are and will be picking them when we get assigned an orphanage. That takes a tremendous amount of faith, but again so many adoption workers and families have told us that when you are shown your children (and they do give you choices) you will know without a doubt who are meant to be yours. A heart braking thing not to take everyone home that is for sure. We have already cried many tears for the children who will not come to our family.

So there you go, the long and the short of it. It will be a hectic 2007, but life is just not the same without a good adventure every now and then. We pray for our girls every night that we will be lead to them and that God will keep them safe and loved until we get there.

Deb